Myth Busting for M-Rated Fics
by PrincessVenture
Summary: Please take a few minutes to read this if you're considering writing an M-rated fic involving smut. / I'm not intending to offend anyone by correcting them, just dispelling some myths for the sake of accuracy.
1. Chapter 1

All right, guys. This technically isn't a story, so it might get taken down, but please hear me out.

So often I'll see M-rated fics in which Austin and Ally engage in, um, sexual activities, usually with Ally losing her virginity. And the process of losing said virginity apparently always involves a significant amount of pain, as well as something about Austin forcing through and breaking her "barrier." These stories aren't _bad_ (most of them are actually really good), but they're anatomically inaccurate. And as a young adult going into the biomedical field, I'm starting to go bonkers when I see fics that misleadingly portray sexuality and anatomy, which then cause less experienced writers to assume that this is how things work and then perpetuate these myths in their own stories.

**If you are in any way uncomfortable with frank discussions about sex and the anatomy of the female reproductive system, this is your chance to gracefully bow out.**

...

Now that we've got the prepubescents, the grandmas, and the popes out of the room, let's talk about "virginity."

There are a lot of different definitions for "losing" one's virginity. Some say a girl loses her virginity when she engages in any kind of sexual contact (so...basically reaching third base), while others claim she's a virgin until she engages in _intercourse specifically._ And then that just opens an entire can of worms about pinning a girl's value on whether or not she has had sex, and _that_ opens the door to slut-shaming. _So let's not go there._ Here, for the sake of argument, I'm going to stick to the medical definition of "virginity."

Most people have the concept that there's this membrane of tissue, called a "hymen" located _somewhere_ (and it's sort of nebulous when it comes to figuring out where exactly it is) inside the vagina, and that a girl loses her virginity when this hymen thingy is broken/torn/popped, hence slang such as "popping her cherry." In reality, the "hymen" is a piece of tissue located just inside the vaginal opening. Assuming you're a girl, you can physically _see_ the thing if you prop a mirror between your knees, the way your pediatrician/primary care physician probably recommended. It'll appear as a pink-ish bit of tissue just inside the "lips" of the opening, and it has a little hole in it called the "corona."

The corona, the hole in the hymen, is a different size and shape for everyone. Infants are born with their hymen intact (no corona), but as girls grow up and reach adolescence, the membrane will thin out and wear down until a corona forms. Some girls will have larger coronas, so it will hurt less when they lose their virginity (I have one friend who said it didn't hurt at all her first time). Other girls have "microperforated" hymens (ones with really small coronas) or "septate" hymens (where the corona is actually two small holes next to each other, separated by a small piece of the hymen) and may find it difficult to insert even a slim tampon. (There are surgical procedures that can correct for these because they can be a problem.)

So, yes, there is a hymen located inside the vagina. But it's not as deep in there as you might have thought. Rather, it's _right there_. It's literally attached to and partially covers the opening. The pain from losing one's virginity comes from the fact that the corona is usually smaller than the diameter of the penis, and it's kind of hard to fit something through an opening that's smaller than the thing you're trying to force through. _So please stop writing about Austin fitting in about six inches before he hits a "barrier" and then forces through it. _There's no other "barrier" back there, except the cervix. But more on that later.

Also, the hymen is not supposed to be intact. The corona's there for a reason. Think about it: The vagina is a self-cleansing organ. How does it expel unwanted "stuff"—how the heck would a girl be able to menstruate if there's no egress (the corona) for the fluid to flow out of? So technically, there's no "popping" going on when a girl loses her virginity, since the hymen is not some kind of air-tight sealing.

While it's true that the pain from losing one's virginity comes from the fact that something bigger is being pushed through the corona, a normal hymen is not supposed to be torn. There's no tearing going on unless the hymen is unusually fragile. Rather, the pain comes from the corona being forced open and stretched. Some girls compare it to a rubber band being stretched tight. You do not lose your hymen when you lose your "virginity." The hymen stays a part of you; the corona just gets bigger.

Now that we've cleared that up, I feel like we should also talk about the G spot. There's still some controversy as to whether it actually exists or whether women who believe they have found theirs only think so because they've been led to believe it exists. Those who subscribe to its existence usually agree that it's located somewhere 1.5 to 3 inches inside, on the front wall, and it's not sensitive for every woman. It's not a "magic button."

**Edit:** To the anonymous reviewer who objected to my using "sexytimes," o.o Is there a problem? I just though it would better to use a euphemism for Doing It instead of scaring off all the readers. I've gone back and changed it now, but I've never met anyone who's had a problem with it. Is there something I'm missing? P.S. April, I added your comment to the list, which I have moved to a new chapter.


	2. Chapter 2

Hey, folks. Some reviewers suggested some additions, so here you go.

Some other myths to bust:

- Deeper isn't always better. The G spot, if it exists, really isn't that far in. There's no need for the guy to bury himself as far as he can because most of the nerve endings in the vagina are towards the entrance. She'll feel him further back, but it's more pressure than pleasure.

- Most guys can't boast 11 inches. The average length is somewhere around 5.5 and 6.5 inches. That's more than enough to get the job done. The average vagina, when unaroused, is only about 3-4 inches deep. It'll lengthen when aroused to accommodate whatever is being inserted, but having the cervix (the opening from the vagina to the uterus) bumped around by an unusually large object can hurt like the dickens because it can cause cramping in the uterus.

- As another reviewer helpfully pointed out, a girl can't get pregnant every time she has sex... Weeelll...actually that's a bit disputed. The menstrual cycle is about 28-ish days long, counting from the first day of menstrual period to the day before the next. There are a limited number of days during the cycle when pregnancy is possible, although some experts will argue that a girl can get technically get pregnant at any point during that cycle, even during menstruation (it's just that some days, the chances of pregnancy are significantly reduced, and pregnancy resulting from having sex during one of those "less fertile" days may be a fluke, a result of irregularities in the cycle). The likelihood of actually becoming pregnant, though, is dramatically increased if you have intercourse in the three days leading up to and including ovulation, about two weeks before the next period. (Disclaimer: Do not attempt to use the rhythm method—that is, not having sex before and during the days you are more fertile—as a reliable form of birth control. It only works for women whose cycles are regular and who are really careful about when they have sex. You can easily wind up pregnant.)

- You can't test positive on a pregnancy test the very next day after you Do It. Pregnancy tests measure for the hCG hormone. These hormone levels do not suddenly spike at the moment of fertilization because the zygote still has to travel down to the uterus and implant. So unless Ally's hormones are out of whack for reasons not related to pregnancy, she shouldn't be testing positive the very next morning. She shouldn't even begin suspecting enough to take a pregnancy test until a few weeks later, when she misses a period.

- "Morning sickness" is a misnomer. For the first six weeks, nausea and vomiting can occur at any time of day or night. If Ally's throwing up in the mornings only, she's one lucky duck.

- A vagina is a vagina. A womb is a womb. The two are not interchangeable. The womb (uterus) is the chamber in which a fetus is supposed to grow, separated from the vaginal canal by the cervix. _So please stop writing about Austin burying himself in Ally's womb_. It's physically impossible.

Hope that cleared some stuff up for you folks. I'm not nitpicking or insisting that those of you who have written M-rated fics in the past go back and fix your stories to comply with the modern scientific understanding of human sexuality. You can choose to take it or leave it. Please don't be offended or feel that I'm criticizing your writing. I just thought I'd clear up some common misconceptions in case anyone was curious but too embarrassed to ask and so that people don't go into their first time with unrealistic expectations.


	3. Chapter 3

Side rant about the clitoris because the sex-ed program they made me go through in public high school didn't utter a peep about it:

More often than not, a girl can't orgasm through intercourse alone. In the 1970s, sexologist Shere Hite found that 70% of women do not achieve orgasm through just intercourse. So if you're a girl and find yourself in this category, don't worry. The other 30% are the weirdos.

That's because, on the female body, the parts that make sex pleasurable are _not_ located on the parts that you actually use to have sex. Like I mentioned in a previous post, most of the nerve endings in the vagina are located near the opening, not further back. But real party is at the clitoris, which most people understand to be a small bundle of about 8000 nerve endings.

Actually, that's only a small part of the clitoris. The majority is inside the body, a network of fibers that wander away from the little bit you see on the outside. The primary function of the clitoris seems to be to give women pleasure (it probably has no other function), but what kind of sucks is that it's located away from the place where intercourse actually happens. So more often than not, either the guy or the girl is going to have to find a way to stimulate the clitoris in addition to the normal activities involved in skoodilypooping (I do not claim ownership of this euphemism; that most likely goes to John Green's grandmother).

Now, from what I've seen, most writers on the A&A fandom seem to know what they're doing when it comes to knowing what to do with the clitoris: mainly, _not_ treating it like some kind of magic button. But I'm going to say it anyway, because who knows who will stumble across this public service announcement? I've been on fandoms where the average fanfiction writer is much better than one on A&A, but then someone will write that the guy presses down on it and the girl implodes, and then I just make like a Nopetopus and skedaddle because _you're doing it wrong._ _DX_

Anyhow, the clitoris is a bit complicated. Sometimes it likes being touched; sometimes it doesn't. Sometimes it feels numb; other times it's so sensitive that it hurts when touched. But _it is not a magic button_. It should not be pressed for magic results to instantly occur.

The whole "magic button" thing really pisses me off, actually. Repeat after me: _The clitoris is not a magic button._

Nor should it be pushed like one. Guys who are unfamiliar with female reproductive anatomy and buy into the "magic button" thing are doing it wrong. *There are no magic buttons.* That idea is a load of crap invented by men who think sex is purely for the guy's enjoyment, and as long as the guy is enjoying it, it's all good and dandy because all he has to do is push the "magic button" to make the girl like it, too. It's the lazy man's way of saying, "Oh, I don't have to put in any effort to make her enjoy it, too, because all I need to do is push on it."

(And now that I've used "magic button" six times in eight sentences, I'm going to go wash my hands.)

...

The reality is that, since the clitoris is so sensitive, stimulating it the wrong way (i.e. treating it like a button by pushing down) is painful. And merely touching it the right way (a way that feels good to her and doesn't hurt) is not an automatic train ticket to O-town, either. If they've been going at it for a while now, and the arousal has been building up, and she's almost there, just needs a _little_ more, the guy can touch her there, and that can be enough for her to climax. But they have to build it up first. Anything less is laziness or misguidance on his part.

Okay, I'll get off my soapbox now.

This was just a side rant. The most important takeaway from anything I've said is in Chapter 1.

**Addendum:** To the guest reviewer who felt compelled to yell at me for attempting to set the record straight for people who choose to read this: I am well aware that this is not a story, as I stated in the first sentence of Chapter 1 of this post. You must have missed or conveniently ignored the **bolded statement** asking readers to bow out if frank discussions of reproductive anatomy make them uncomfortable, seeing as you clearly hold dear your unrealistic expectations and ideals about sex and were so offended by the truth. I may have not posted a story, but I'll have you know I am more than capable of writing things other than public service announcements. And maybe people didn't _ask_ for a "freaking health lesson," but maybe there are people who do want to know - either for personal reasons or for future stories of their own - but are too embarrassed to ask a parent/teacher or look it up themselves because it'll wind up in the search history of a shared computer. Those are the people who I wrote this post for, not people like you who can't even follow simple directions like "Don't read on if you're going to get uncomfortable."

I have to say, the fact that you bothered to take the time and _leave a comment_ on my post, to which you have obvious aversions, says a great deal more about you than it does about me. If you didn't want your illusions about human sexuality shattered, maybe you shouldn't have read past "**If you are in any way uncomfortable with frank discussions about sex and the anatomy of the female reproductive system, this is your chance to gracefully bow out."** Or maybe, instead of preferring to keep your head buried in the sand, you are a MRA hell bent on keeping women in the dark about their own sexuality so that misogynists can continue to enjoy their women without having to put in any effort to reciprocate. In which case, kindly take your foot out of your mouth and consider reevaluating your priorities.

Otherwise, I hope your first time met/will meet your ever-so-precious unrealistic expectations.


End file.
